All around the world
From Hemel to Havana
There are people being injured
In the most appalling manner

Crashing through window panes
Landing on all fours
Getting parts of bodies jammed
In revolving doors

Charging down corridors
Like demon rugby aces
Broken bones, battered limbs
Bruises on their faces

Smashing through all obstacles
With a wide array of tools
Breaking all the government's
Health and Safety rules

Tumbling out of aeroplanes
Jumping off of trains
Dodging cars and being hit
In busy traffic lanes

Who are these brave young folk
I hear you all enquire
Are they the President's men
Diving in the line of fire

Or are they NASA's finest
On a mission bound for Mars
Or stuntmen in the movies
Acting double to the stars

NO! These driven, hardy souls
Total nervous wrecks
Are nothing more than waiters
Giving Yusuf back his specs!